How to catch an elephant

Hungry hungry food restrained elephant

Thursday 1/31/13 - Ellie Von Bun

Just for starters, I noticed something odd about my last post. You might have noticed it too. I really don't know what happened, but hell, I just had to add my face multiple times like a 13-year-old girl who adds some lame filter to her upward taken photo and if she's feeling super deep, add some meaningful lyrics to it.

But just to make things right, I'll just leave this here.


I have a bone to pick with Canada.

One of my top reasons why I choose to go to Canada was the language barrier. I didn't want any. Because I have celiacs, I need to check every freaking product for traces of gluten. Which sucks altogether but think about me checking some Korean product for it's ingrediments. Yeah, good luck with that, I'm so good in Korean you know.

So English speaking country it is! I was confident and merry about my choice and arrived ready and feeling normal about my diet to be.

It's been three weeks and oh boy I want to eat.

No, let me refrase that, I want to eat food happily without the dark cloud on top if me that reminds me of not knowing if the food has gluten or not.


Guess what? Canada has the same feeling towards deep fried stuff and unhealthy white, doughy products as US.

They even deep fry some of their sushi. What the fuck is up with that? Who in their right minds wants to deep fry sushi?

And even if it's not deep fried, it has wheat protein or some else little fuckers that makes me think that they are doing it just of spite.

I believe every freaking place have their very own flourshaker. They make the food normally, realize it actually is gluten-free, so they add a hint of that beautiful snowywhite ingrediment of their cute little shakers.

Right now, my poor stomach is saying "HAHA, No.", I feel stuffed and huge and ill and I just want to sleep and cradle my food baby. And maybe throw up once in a while. Morning sickness is normal even with a food baby.

And I am sure I am eating gluten so often that all other side effects are showing their ugly heads.

I'm just so tired, sleepy and exhausted (different things!) that I'm not up for anything. I remind me of my old superhero alter ego Cocoon-girl. My super power is being able to create a cocoon out of anything, everywhere and disappearing in the darkest corner making horrible sound effects ("I'm so broken, squeeee!").

And also, I'm so god damn hungry.


There are still few nice things in the food area.

It's easy to pick up a fresh fruit platter from a near store, and there are few pizza and pasta places that have gluten-free stuff. McDonalds can go to hell here as I haven't yet found a place that had the gluten-free buns they have in Finland.

I think I need a bit more time and go to the right stores.

Finland, you beautiful old bastard, you know your gluten-free stuffs. I'm sorry for ever doubting you.

I'll end this with a picture that I dedicate to my sister. Shh, it's okay, you can be jealous.


Okay, now that 3 weeks has past of my last post I have to say few things other than whining about food.

I've been extremely lazy and gone to very close my "No." phase which is bad. Then when I almost got out of it I got sick instead and have been avoiding world some time. I need my time goddamit!

Weird thing about local medicine. I've been living few days with cough syrup as my throat has never been this sore in my entire life. The medicine is a tad stronger than back home so I've been kinda out of this world. Medicine, sleep, Harry Potter, sleep, medicine and so on.

I'm in The Order of Phoenix by the way.

It's so freakishly cold I already got a frostbite on my nose but didn't take a picture of it because I was in pain.

Did I already mention I'm out of this world?

Tomorrow I'll be back in school and I'll be damned if I keep leaving my camera behind anywhere I go. Sigh.

Just. I just. I'm wordless. I'll be back when I'm healthy and have found my reason to come out of "No."s. Cheers!

Leave a comment. Keywords: canada, celiacs

I'm pretty sure I'm going to die this semester

Friday 1/11/13 - Ellie Von Bun

I have to shamefully admit that I have a quality that causes problems in my character and mental health. This despicable feature is, naturally, considering myself smarter than most of the people.


Nobody likes the assholes who thinks too much of themselves. So that is one reason for hiding that thought.

Nothing brings you down more than succeeding worse than you were expecting of yourself. Also when you realize how badly you are thinking of everyone else, you start to comprehend your own stupidness and oh the shame.

Again I'm having my famous empiric experiences about my smartness. As I've started a fresh start in a school with interesting classes, I automatically am checking how I'm doing with minimal effort and how others are failing around me.


And of course, soon I'll be late with assignments and when the finals edge near I will freak out.

The classes in Canada are quite different from what I'm used to back in Finland in my horrible school. Of course, I have different subjects and here it is much more University-like with lectures where you (oh my gosh) don't interact with the teacher.

At least the teachers seem really, really good. All of them are psyched about their subjects. You can see the autistic glee in their eyes when they are explaining the depths of what they know while trying to control their saliva from sliding off their mouths.

And this is what I absolutely love about teachers.


I did already consider dropping a class. And why would I give up so quickly?

The course I'm talking about is almost like Programming II back home called Intermediate Data Structure and Algorithms, so that's not that bad, right?


The set-up is annoyingly different from the programming I'm used to. Yeah, they use Java and Eclipse and all that shit I'm familiar with, but what the hell!

This shit doesn't say anything to me.

Do I really need to analyze and make calculations of how many statements my piece of code does? Yeah, it is important to make efficient and fast programs but honestly, this is not the way to go. Really.

Because everyone else has learned these analysing types in earlier classes, I'm a bit screwed. Luckily there is Tutorial classes that helps noobs like me to catch up. Unlucky for me, last time I had troubles focusing to the teaching.

If I looked at the board my eyes started to droop.

If I looked at the teacher I started to drool and think of unspeakable things.

If I looked at the table I had this growing desire to crawl on top of it and fall asleep.

So what to do?

My three other courses seems more easier, at least in the sense of staying awake. I have to make my own app for mobile platform and I don't know yet what to do. Maybe I just copy the idea of my t-shirt and call the app The Legend of Linkstache. There would be Link and you can insert different types of 'staches on his face. That would be cool.


If all else fails, I just drop that course or let it fail. I'm okay with this.

Leave a comment. Keywords: school, canada, stress

Jet laggy monster wants to sleep

Monday 1/7/13 - Ellie Von Bun

It's been five days since I arrived to Canada and it's also time to tell what's been up!


I actually lied before, I never went through Toronto. I totally forgot about that! So I had the longest flight of my life from London to Calgary. But free drinks and food while watching movies is a good way to spend time.

Red Dragon was very good and Jumanji is even better movie with fairly original idea. I also drank wine watching it so it got nice twist to it! Love Actually sucked monkey balls and I fell asleep between. Sleepy Hollow was, well, good enough. Wished I would have watched Babe instead.


So yesterday I was at my first party and do forgive me for being tired and a bit hangovery. It's also great time to blog because now I finally have enough time to do so.


The 22-hour trip was quite harsh and the jet lag after that quite tiresome. I arrived rather late and took a cab to hotel and slept like a baby. In the morning I decided to walk to the university with my luggage and all.

I actually had my first class the very first day, so I got my student card and paid rent and waited before going to Psychology 121, even before seeing my home to be.


I really like the classes I have had so far. And if they seem too much for me, I can always drop one. Two of them are Computer Science, one is Psychology and one is Classical, Medieval and Renaissance Study or something like that. There is still one CMPT course I've not been yet, but the other one seems nice and very close to my courses back home. So I'm happy about my choices!

One thing that bothers me is how expensive the textbooks are. $100 a piece is a lot. And what the seven hells, why I need three books for one course? Get your heads out of your asses.


My first days have run from orientation to shopping and trying to remember all the people and their names. Actually one Fin is most likely related to me, how freaky is that?

I really like my apartment and the school. I'm even more psyched about the new people I've met. So everything is really peachy!


I already had my authentic Canadian experience as I went to watch local hockey game. These people take hockey seriously. Just saying. Also, we won.

Now if you'll excuse me, I have to continue my important job of hanging and making a mess. I'll continue later.


Leave a comment. Keywords: canada